Childless and motherless on mother's day

For years, I enjoyed Mother’s Day. It was a perfect time to tell my mom, grandma and aunts exactly what they meant to me. However, in 2001, that all changed. My mother who was my best friend and confidante, died. Life was so different. There was a void that no one and nothing could fill. In time, the pain became a dull ache. But, I don’t believe you ever get over your mother’s death, I believe God gives you grace to get through it.
When I turned 30, I felt like my life was just beginning. I was so excited about 30 being the new 20. I was looking forward to meeting my husband, getting married and having my 2.5 kids. I was excited about my share of the “Good Life”. I didn’t want anyone’s share, just my portion. So I waited patiently for Prince Charming. When I turned 39, I was quickly running out of my 30’s and 40’s looked good professionally, but personally, I was still waiting on Prince Charming, my babies and my piece of the “Good Life”. That year, I realized that Mother’s Day had a different meaning. Mother’s Day became one of those holidays that made me cringe. I didn’t have my mother any longer to celebrate and I hadn’t had any kids so Mother’s Day was quickly becoming a Holiday that I could skip. I would think, I can just stay in the house on this day and sleep or watch movies or just veg out.
To be motherless and childless on Mother’s Day was an albatross around my neck. What was I really celebrating? It was difficult to deal with the grief of missing your mom and the realization that perhaps you will never be a mom.
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So what do the single women with no kids and no moms do on Mother’s Day? This year I made up my mind to be and do better. This year I decided to:

1. Celebrate the mothers in your life! All of us without a shadow of a doubt, know mothers. Our sisters, best friends, church members, cousins, aunties, co-workers are mothers. Celebrate them! Call or text each one of them (individually) and wish them a Happy Mother’s Day. This day is about moms. So celebrate moms!
   
2. Remember the good times! This is an easy one for me. My mother was the most important person in my life up until I was 24. When she died, there was a void in my life. But slowly and surely the tears were replaced by GOOD memories. Fun Memories. Running with the kite through a field by our neighborhood, playing jacks in the middle of the kitchen floor, doing flips in the backyard and singing at the laundry mat when we were alone. I could go on. The memories are so vivid and real that sometimes I think that I can reach out and touch her. #ForTheGoodTimes 
3. Enjoy life! Life is for the living. It’s time to live. Two things that are guaranteed in life are death and taxes. Both come. Most of us hate both of them, but that’s why it is so important to live now! Unless the Lord comes back to get us soon, we will ALL face death and the death of our loved ones. It is so important to live life to the fullest each day. Regretting nothing! You want to start a clothing line, write a book, travel the world, teach children in other countries? Do it today! Stop thinking about living and ENJOY LIFE NOW!

 Being Motherless and Childless are nothing compared to being Grateful!  

#SweetTea
#JustforToday